Men - Confessions

So, Masturbation is a struggle every few days,and my thought life is in turmoil. I think I am having trouble giving up the desire to meet up with a guy and mess around,be curious,etc. A lot of straight guys even do/did that growing up,and i just feel its something i'd like to experience. The drive is very strong. Physically im attracted to guys,wouldnt date them though. Anyone relate?