My lovely husband of 21 years, walked out, left me with an std, got a young girl pregnant, spent 5 weeks alone in Thailand, had images of 19 year old girls on his computer, while he had 2 teenage daughters under our roof. I put my foot down. He became more abusive toward me, telling me, it was my fault, because I was not a 'ten'. I confess I personalized this, felt somehow to blame, which kept it going. I took responsibility for things that were not mine, which let him off the hook. I am responsible for letting him off the hook. I struggle still to stand, but each day I am getting stronger. I wanted to be loved so badly, that I sacrificed what was right for security. In the end, I lost it all. But I am gaining me back, maybe for the first time ever. My life is now about making sure each day, that nothing comes before God. God makes all things new. I used to run, now I limp, but at least I am still hobbling forward...towards the finish line. I am nearly divorced, forced to sell my home, nearly bankrupt, but my spirit has returned to my Lord, the author and finisher of my faith.