I accepted Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior three years ago. Till this day, I suffer from pornography addiction....lesbian pornography, which I find to be quite odd due to the fact that I am a straight woman. I was exposed to pornography by the age of 17 of when I was a senior in high school and I'm not quite sure what triggered me to watch it, it just happened. I was extremely promiscuous by the age of 19, engaging in only oral sex and thank the Lord I didn't catch anything. I would hook up with many guys and I had my first encounter with a woman as well. I must say that those experiences still taunt me to this day. I feel like every time I get..well, let's be real, horny, I cannot control myself, so I end up watching porn. I'm starting to resent it as well. I've prayed, read the Bible, asked the Lord to free me from these chains, but I just feel I don't have the strength to overcome this addiction..I'm also in a committed relationship where God has revealed that he is my future husband. When I marry him, I want to be satisfied with my sex life. I want to enjoy the true pleasure of sex and to experience the definition of sex just the way God created it to be..between man and wife. I want to think about my husband and only my husband for when I marry him. Just getting the feeling of knowing that I'm not thinking of the person I love has been revealed to me that I may be choking on my lust. When it comes to masturbating..I usually think of women and it disgusts me. This isn't normal and I need some sort of guidance to help me become a better godly woman. I'm a very strong Christian, but I feel like such a hypocrite. It took me a while to confess my sin to the public, at Bible Studies, my family, etc..now I just want to truly break free from these chains, so that the Lord can mold me into the woman that God wants me to be. Please help:/ I'm desperate.